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Showing posts from November, 2013

The Doctor and I

With the Doctor Who 50th Anniversary upon us, and my merciless spamming of Who related articles, videos triva and general fangirl squealing, it seems only fitting that I write a blog about what the Doctor means to me. It seemed so simple when I thought of this blog idea, but actually articulating it is much more difficult. For some people Doctor Who is a fun TV show they enjoy, for some, like me it's so much more.

I'm the 'lost generation' of Whovians, the ones who didn't get to hide behind the sofa as children. The ones who didn't play at being Daleks and Cybermen in the playground and who never, as a youngster had to go through the heartbreak of seeing your best friend the Doctor's face change before your eyes and be replaced by someone who just wasn't quite right. Until the next one came along.

That doesn't mean that Doctor Who is any less important or hasn't been any less formative in my life. For me instead of my childhood Doctor Who define…

A real low point

I'm going to try and do more generic 'PhD' updates, just because it might help my sanity at this point, and because I quite like reading other people's so maybe there are people who like mine? (they do say misery loves company)

Also because I'm coming out of a hellish week. This time last week I spent most of the day in tears, and another day later that week. It was directly and indirectly PhD related at once.

Today I sent off a batch of chapters to my one supervisor.  A big part of my stress levels and general unhappy mindset last week, the deadline for this is slightly accelerated from what we'd previously agreed due to one of them leaving to take another job in January. Although this comes with some (mainly logistical and administrative) issues it's actually a blessing because it's really focused the team and me and forced me to submit work faster. Hopefully as well, I'll get detailed feedback too which I can work on over the Christmas 'break…

Being in it.

I think it's fair to say I've had better weeks.

Actually for once the PhD itself isn't the issue. Yes if I think about it too hard I could panic or spiral into a 'it's never going to be finished or good enough' type mindset. But generally if I'm plodding along with it, then it's ok, until I realise how little time I have to plod on with it.

It's the demands of everything else that is the problem. Not even the things themselves so much as the strange effect everything has when you're 'in the thick of it.' and that clawing feeling that so few people understand.

It was like a revelation last week when someone said to me (ok let's be honest my crying self) "Yes but everyone else isn't doing a PhD at the same time" if I wasn't already crying I'd have cried with happiness that someone got it and vocalised it. That someone both said it and was willing to use it as a reason to excuse me, not even excuse maybe just expla…

The National at 50

I've written this because I can't articulate my feelings about the NT50 celebration in any kind of social media format, and because even after sleeping on it I can't stop thinking about it.

I love the National Theatre, it's been a focus of my research for over three years now, and it's very much at the centre of my theatre going life. I admire the work done by those who work there and I think it is very much at the centre of British theatrical life. That said I am not blinkered, sometimes they get things wrong But isn't that the essence of being an arts organisation, you take risks, you get it wrong sometimes. If they weren't getting things wrong they wouldn't be innovating, so I forgive, embrace those things. And anyway one person's wrong in art is another person's just right.

Of course with all celebratory performances/programmes this could have hit the wrong tone. And that worried me. That it would be filled with sycophantic pomp and not enou…